a great writer

sometimes i think
i can write it all down
that im clever enough to find the right words
all the right words
that can capture these feelings
down to
the
very
last one

but i do believe ive been fooling myself
the idea that terror can find a home on the page
is actually quite silly

when i consider all the great writers
i realize their themes of love and jealousy
anger and vengeance
hope and despair are all quite easy to catch
compared to the terror of death

not the death of yourself, of course
or the grief of death already passed

but the terror that death is to come into your own body
but that is not your own
hasn’t been covered too much

and i dont think
despite all my efforts for trying
that i will be the first
to get it done