ashes to ashes

the quiet roar of impermanence
taunts me as i try to fall asleep

my thoughts wrestle each other,
and pin me against the pillow

i scratch the enamel off my teeth
and look at the clock

another day has gone by
and we are all still alive
(and i am thankful but still afraid)

because this night, like all the others,
this night seems so damn long

“kathy don’t be crazy,” i tell myself,
“children don’t just spontaneously die when the sun goes down,”

except, of course,
that sometimes they do.